Last to days: been using opk's & so far so good no O yet - good didn't want to O before i got my swimmers=)

Today: getting more & excited-they'll be sending my swimmers out.. omg i can't hardly wait- it's almost as exciting as getting a + pg test lol

Hoping & praying i'm one of the lucky ones to have AI work the first time around- even though i know it might not work the  first time , i'm in good spirits.

To be continued...

DH had a vasectomy years before me.  Eventually he had a reversal (VR) and that took fairly for a while.  We conceived when his motile counts were only 1 million/mL, but miscarried.  When repeat checks showed the VR had scarred over and counts were zero, we decided to go the donor route.  After much review, we chose NW for all sorts of wonderful reasons and selected a donor we pretty much fell in love with.

7/22: new cycle and finalization of all the paperwork in the following week.

8/2: called to place our preliminary order and planned to call back when O was closer.  We expected O around 8/11.  We call and notify our midwives that we expect O in about a week.

8/4: called to arrange actual shipment on 8/5 and plans for specimen to arrive 8/9.

8/5: panic sets in when I have gobs of EWCM and I'm realizing O is likely to be over the weekend.  Calls to NW and the amazing Zach and arrangements are made for faster delivery.

8/6: Specimen arrives!

8/7: First positive OPK at 5pm!

8/8: We call our midwives to let them know we expect to IUI tomorrow.  We realize that we'd really prefer to IUI twice: this night (24h after OPK) and then next morning (36 hours).  But, on our first try and learning the ropes we decided to get only one specimen.

8/9: We talk to the midwives who are busy with multiple births but will of course squeeze us in.  We head to the birth center around 10am and arrive to a baby just born, another woman in labor and another one on her way in.  Midwife is busy but things settle slightly and we begin.  Temp dip this morning, which often happens the day I O.

She examines my cervix for a quick check.  It looks soft and CM is still EW but beginning to transition to creamy/yellow again.  We review the procedure and a few million other things and she leaves us to thaw the specimen.

When we're thawed, she comes back in and we do the actual IUI.  Since we get to do them in the birth center, I'm laid back on a big queen size bed.  DH helps her with the specimen so she stays sterile.  Then, he's free to come support me.  There is the expected cramping and DH kisses me through it.  It's all over pretty quickly and DH climbs onto the bed with me and we cuddle and talk for 30 minutes while my hips are propped up.  I turn from side to side, too.

IUI occurred around 11:30am, which was about 42 hours after first positive OPK.  I was doing 3-4 OPKs a day, so feel like I caught the very beginning of my surge with that.  We are guessing that I O'd at some point today, so we're hoping that those sperm woke up and took off swimming to find a freshly released egg.

We've been charting for ages and feel pretty confident with my cycle and when everything happens.  Once we got over the surprise of Oing a couple days earlier than we expected, all other signs were my normal and we think lined up well.  Whether or not this was really the best IUI time (36+ hours after surge/on the day of O), we don't know.  Everyone is certainly different.  Next time, we plan on getting two vials to go more for 24 and 36 hours.

DH has been learning how to check my cervix, so hopefully as he gets better at that, we'll have a better idea of when the cervix is really ready.  On O day I tend to have a decrease in EWCM, so we're wondering if it would be better to go earlier when my CM is still crazy in volume and eggwhiteyness rather than right when we think O is occurring.  Cx was really open today per the MW with the catheter just sliding right in easier than most, so perhaps O day is still a decent way to go.  Only time will tell.

For now, we will return the dewar tomorrow and learn how that part of the process goes.  Then, it's just plain old 2ww stuff.  My birthday is 2 weeks from now...can't imagine a better present!  We're hopeful, of course, but we figure our chances are slim on round 1 and this was a learning cycle.  We plan to stick with this unmedicated midwife-assisted IUI process through the end of the year and if we haven't conceived by that time, then we'll consider other options like change in donor, home ICIs or even perhaps medicated IUIs with an MD.

Blessings to all,
Tracy

I visited a new OB in May, and he prescribed 100mg of Clomid to help with my long and anovulatory cycles.  FF has shown a pattern of ovulation on cd18, so this month I ordered the vial to arrive on cd14 (the 11th of August), and I plan on inseminating about twelve hours after my +OPK.  I will use the smilies this time around, too. If timing goes as planned, I will inseminate on cd18 (August 15th).

What I did differently this time: I used three vials instead of two. I timed these at 6, 18 and 30 hours after the positive OPK. Then I think I felt ovulation for the first time at 44 hours after the first positive OPK! Hopefully the timing was okay, but I feel like I may have learned something about my body. I wonder if that was ovulation-- can't believe I've never really felt it in 20 years of getting my period!

For the third vial, I also tried some preseed for the first time. That went okay.

Next time (if there is a next time) I am thinking of trying Instead cups, but I feel like I should probably practice with them first. I'm worried they'll somehow lead to a waste of the sperm.

I wish there weren't so many variables, but I do believe in both "miracles" and in the power of biology.

Now begins the TWW which for me is really a 12-day wait. The last week of it has not been fun in the past so I'm hoping to distract myself this time with long books, walks, movies...

We are still on our break from ttc but will begin again as soon as everything is in place with the sperm bank.  We are no longer going to use our known donor and will be using a frozen donor from here on out. 

We're excited, scared, and a little anxious.  But overall, we're ready to be mommies.

IT WILL HAPPEN! I WILL BE A MOTHER!!!

5 IUI @ MD BFN
Try#3 @ home BFP 10/07 Miscarriage at 10w 12/07

Cycle #1 2008

cd 1   8-30-08
cd 20 Smiley & Peak on CBFM
         inseminated once at about 15 hours past +
cd 26 Very tired but that could be due to kicking caffiene!

BFN

Not sure if we are trying again next month or not, not sure I can do this right now...

This month -

~We will use a collection condom instead of a regular latex condom for collection.
~We will inseminate only when I get a positive OPK instead of relying on what the ovulation calculator online says.
~I will track my temps with a Basal Thermometer instead of a regular digital thermometer. 
~I will use the cervical cup to avoid spillage
~I will sit with my hips elevated for a few hours
~I will have the big O after the insemination

So far...

CD 1 - Heavy, lots of cramping, very emotional
CD 2 - Medium, lots of cramping

TTC#1 was a BFN

TTC #2 we switched donors to our first choice.
I did 100mg of Clomid CD5-9
Felt a big heat wave every day!! Very moody and could just snap at a minutes notice.

CBFM started reading High on CD11 I NEVER got a PEAK!!
After researching it online I found out that Clomid will sometimes interfer with the CBFM.
Odd b/c in April when I was on 50mgs it read High and then 2 days of PEAK.
I was getting really discouraged and thought my body was failing me.
So, I jumped the gun and did an insemination 44hrs prior to a Positive OPK.
That was on CD16 @ 4pm

FINALLY on CD18 I had a SMILEY!!!
I insemed @ 2.5 hrs after first smiley.

CD19 I still had a SMILEY so I insemed @ 11am
At 10:28pm I was NEGATIVE  on the OPK's.

CD 20 my temp was higher (93.92) and I was High on the CBFM and negative on OPK's.

So, it makes me think that I did ovulate on CD19 (waiting on FF to determine O date by temps).

So my insem times with IUI vials were:
44hrs prior to Positive OPK
2.5 hrs AFTER Positive OPK
21 hrs AFTER Positive OPK

So, now I just wait patiently (Yeah right!!)

150mgs Clomid CD's 3-7
2000mgs Metformin daily
DHA supplement daily
Prenatal daily
Preseed, tomcat catheter, needless syringe
1 at home insemination 24 hours past + OPK.
I've promised my wife I will not test unless I get to 16 DPO with no signs that AF is coming.

So, that's the plan! If this first one doesn't work we'll try again in July. We'll do 3-4 at home cycles before going back to the Dr.

Shannon

I think this has always been my destiny, to have a child on my own.  When I was little like mmm probably 10 or so I said "Im never getting married, Im going to work, make my own money, buy a house, have a baby and retire on my own IRA"  Thats probably verbatim.  Talk about a self fulfilling prophecy! 

I grew up in Southern Maine, moved to San Diego when I was 25 and stayed for 7 years.  Had a few long term relationships that never really panned out to anything permanant.  All the while desperately trying NOT to get pregnant.  So at 32 I moved back to the East Coast to finish my nursing degree and be closer to family.  My parents had migrated down to Maryland, brother and his wife are in NY.   I thought Id meet the man of my dreams, maybe a doctor and settle down, get married, have a few kids and live happily ever after.  Well that didnt exactly happen. 

I again had a few long term relationships but nothing really panned out.  Still thinking white pickett fence and trying desperately NOT to get pregnant.  So as the years passed 35, 36, 37 I was still thinking "prince charming"  I was dating like a mad woman trying to find Mr. Right.  I graduated, worked in an ER in Baltimore City, lived in Federal Hill.  I was reliving my 20s and having a blast.  I finally had enough and moved out to Carroll County.  I started working in the ER here.  I wanted to make my life here.  I emersed myself in the community.  Volunteered at Fall Fest for Hospice, I started volunteering at this free clinic.  Within a year I was the coordinator at this free clinic and I feel this is what I was meant to do.  I love my job as a medical social worker and nurse.  I help people navigate our crazy messed up healthcare system when they dont have insurance.  I really feel I am making a difference in the world.

So at this point in my life Im 37, I have a great job I love, I live close to my VERY close knit family, my sister and I have bought a great house in my little town I love so much.  I had started the paperwork for NWAC and THEN>>>>>> I meet this great guy, older, never married no kids.  Seems great right?  Well we get to the bedroom and "houston we have a problem"  The more we try, the less success we have.   So the more we talk the more I find out this has been going on with him for ten or so years and he has never addressed it properly.  So I again put the baby dreams on hold and start out on the ED quest.  Doctors, therapist, more doctors.............. Finally after a year and a half.................... we found a great doctor and a very low Testosterone level.

So the cure for Low Testosterone is Testosterone replacement, which kills sperm oddly enough.  The body gets all this exogenous testosterone so the testes say "hey I dont need to work as hard anymore" With the testes shutting down the sperm go down with them. 

We discuss what to do, should we try with his sperm before he goes on the hormones.  He is having a bit of a hard time with all the news and the changes (he is not a guy who loves change).  His Sperm analysis is really bad.  Probably due to the fact his testes really arent functioning and havent been for the last 10 years.  Less than 10m, less than 1% motility and VERY POOR morphology.   So Poor T, He is devastated.    That was January.  Now here I am......  Trying to have a baby on my own.  T is supportive of my choice but we are not married nor do we live together.   The last year of no sex has really taken its toll on us.  Its more than just the sex, its the intimacy that goes along with it.  The hopes and dreams of a future with children.   I feel like I want to work on the relationship give it a bit more time but time is something I am running out of........................  A baby will change the dynamic of our already non conventional relationship but this is something I need to do!  I need to finally put me first.

So Insem number one......  One vial ICI.  The clear blue fertility monitor is telling me I am fertile days 12 and 13 so I insem like 16 hours after my first peak reading.  BFN

Insem number two.... Never get a peak, nor a lh surge.  I start checking the other signs, cervix, mucous etc.... I started testing on day 10  turns out that was too late...............  Send my swimmers back.....

Insem number three............ Got a snazzy new Ovacue monitor.  Have my Swimmers arriving on day 11.  Im in the bathroom at work on day 10 doing my vaginal reading on the monitor and holy xxx, I almost drop the damn thing in the toilet.  Ovulation Confirmed............. WHAT?  Day 10?  its too early!!!  I go home and check my cervix, WIDE open, could practically drive a truck through it, but NO SWIMMERS.  they are not due to arrive until tomorrow, which is technically too late.  Im like youve got to be kidding me, can I not catch a friggin break anywhere?  The Nurse Practitioner at work says go ahead and insem one vial after youget them if your cervix is still open.   OK!    So I wait all damn day.  The last two times they have been on my porch at noon, but of course not this time.  Deliver at 520pm.  Have to stay at work till 730.  FLY home, check my cervix, still open just a little.  I went ahead and inseminated one vial sent the last one back.  This one vial has now travelled cross country and back twice for gods sake.
BFN

I will be 39 in one month.  So I had told myself Id find an RE after my third insemination.  I found one that takes my insurance and they have an opening on April 13.  Exactly one month before my birthday.  I went and had the initial consult and work up.  We are monitoring my cycle this month.  Ultra sound on CD 10 just to make sure I am ovulating that early.  I will go ahead and inseminate my well traveled baby juice on my own.  If it doesnt take then the RE will be my last option.  I really really really dont want to do it that way tho.  Its SUPER expensive.  My insurance doesnt cover xxx after the first consult.  So a monitored clomid cycle with trigger, three ultra sounds and an in office IUI is a whopping 1200 bucks plus sperm.  If I forgo the in office IUI and do it from home 900 bucks plus sperm.

If it comes to that I will have to get a better paying job.  I LOVE my job but helping the poor just doesnt pay and the insurance sucks!  I am just praying that this last cycle will be my BFP. 

I feel more prepared and have more knowlege about my cycle.  My bloodwork came back fine so I have good ovarian reserve.  Im still a little nervous about the 91 estradiol but the doctor isnt concerned so I am trying not to be as well.  I am looking forward to the sono at cd10 as it is the only TRUE way to know if youve ovulated or not. 

My plan is to use my arsinal of ovulation predictors, CBEFM, LH sticks, Ovacue and U/S.  Hopefully pinpoint ovulation and do my own IUI at home. 

I just want to have a baby already!

Insem #1
CD 16 (April 14th):  All that day i'd been "feeling fertile."  It started out with good ferning on the microscope.  I had TONS AND TONS of EWCM.  My cervix was super high...the highest I've ever noticed it.  My Os was open.  I had some mild twinges in my lower abdomen.  Everything looked good...except OPKs.  (Back story...OPKs and I aren't friends.  In all my life i've only had ONE true positive.)  Sooooo....we went with our gut and insemmed at 8pm that evening.  I pulled out the trusty speculum and the preseed.  Lubed up myself and the spec.  Amz held a flashlight and injecting "near" the Os.  I say "near" because I can only go off what she said.  We used a 5cc syringe and some 1.5 in 20g cathaters that I had gotten my hands on....from "somewhere."    Anywho...after the insem I sat there with hips elevated for about 10 minutes, took out the spec, and had the big O.  I then continued laying with hips elevated for about an hour and placed an instead cup in.  I slept in it all night (about 8 hours total). 

We were going to do insem #2 the next day, but I didn't see any favorable temp change in the morning.  I tested with OPK after OPK after OPK...seeing a really distinct change during the day.  I decided we'd hold off until either a positive OPK or whenever Amz had to leave for her weekend trip to Austin to visit her parents (whichever came first). 

Insem #2
CD 18 (April 16th):  My temp went up a bit this morning; not much, but the highest recorded temp this cycle.  OPKs with FMU yeilded negatives.  I went to work at 4 and around 6 am noticed that my left side was hurting and I felt like I needed to go pee all the time.  Being a nurse, I didn't get a chance to actually go pee until 8:30 am.  I tested with a CVS brand OPK and got a negative.  The pain in my side stuck around until about noon...when again I had the uncontrolable urge to pee.  So i used the one and only smiley i'd brought with me.  It was POSITIVE !!!!!  So i took a pic and sent it to Amz.  I didn't get home until nearly 3 and Amz really needed to head out our she'd be sitting in an extra 1-2 hours of traffic.  I would have liked to wait a little bit longer to insem (at least 8 hours past +) but it was just about 3.  I drew up some preseed into the syringe this time along with the sperm.  We insemmed with the same syringe/cath combo as before and I had the big O.  I waited for 30 minutes with hips elevated before putting in the instead cup.

I started using my OPK's today and right now I have only the faintest line. I am however starting to get a little CM.  I will be testing for ovulation about 3 times a day until the big day.  I am due to ovulate on Thursday and strangly enough I have Thursday off work, so I really hope that I get a positive OPK on Wednesday. 

The clinic wants me to call in at lunch time the day of the Positive OPK to Scheduale the insemination for 12 noon the next day.   What happends if I don't get my Positive until wednesday night?  So many little things to worry about.  I will be very happy when I get that smiley face and can make some concrete plans.

I would really like a BFP this cycle as my sister had a baby boy 2 months ago and it would be really cool if they could be best friends and go to school together.

Here's hoping for lots of sticky baby dust for me.

Cd #1  2/23/09
Clomid 50mgs 2/25-3/1
I started taking 2000mgs of Metformin daily 1 month prior to the start of cycle.
OPK+ CD 14 3/8/09
IUI 24 hours later on 3/9/09
AF arrived on 3/25/09

I had 3 follicles that cycle ranging from 17mm-20mm. My lining was fine. However, my estrogen level was only 79. My Dr. chalked that up to lab error. My 7 DPO progesterone level was 21.2  We used donor 060L for this cycle.

This cycle our protocol will differ somewhat. We are using a new donor. I am still taking the Metformin 2000mgs daily. I'm taking 100mgs of Clomid on cd's 3-7. We will do an HCG trigger shot the evening of my + OPK if my u/s at the Dr looks good. I will have my IUI done 36 hours after the trigger.

I have PCOS and endometriosis. I've had 3 surgeries for the endo and I've done 6 months of Lupron shots for the endo.

Wish me luck!  :-)  Veronica